Don’t hate me. But I can’t keep away from Britain’s Got Talent.
I know it’s a pile of chavvy tat. Modern life’s answer to the Medieval village square, where the local simpletons would eat dung and stick rats up their noses to pleasure the heckling townsfolk. I get that.
And I know my life would be better without the endless parade of street dance troops, balancing dogs and jokes about Simon’s trousers.
I know it. So I swear off it this time every year. I kid myself that I’ll switch off and do something more constructive. Write a novel, learn Swahili, train for a marathon…
…Until I take a sneaky peak at the telly, and I’m hooked.
I loathe myself.
But I can’t help it. Something inside me kicks in, and will not let me quit. That same rubber-necking instinct that makes people gawp at accidents has me sitting open-mouthed at Chinese blokes catching tea cups on their gonads:
It’s a powerful force that locks me into bad habits, despite my better judgement.
But hey – you do it, too.
You repeat your mistakes, at will. Like:
- “I don’t get enough business from networking, but it’s still my only lead source”
- “My ad in the local rag never works, but I run it just in case”
- “I keep paying that SEO guy, but I still can’t find us on Google”
Know what I mean?
The bad habit that brings dire results – but you’re stuck with it all the same.
Locked forever in a spiral of disappointment.
So here’s a radical thought:
Slap yourself hard, and make the change you know you have to make.
Look, I’ll ditch BGT and you quit the useless marketing habit – deal?
You stop doing all that pointless stuff that gets you nowhere. Stop repeating and hoping it’ll somehow get better. And next year, I’ll turn my back on Dec (and if he’s forgiven, Ant).
Are you in?
Go on. I’ll even help you snap out of it.
Ask nicely and I’ll work with you, to develop a winning strategy. In place of the broken old one.
You can do this. Hell, we can do it together.
Breaking free at last.
No more chavvy tat for me. No more crap results for you.
Let’s do it…
(Ooh, and while I’m at it…Wiggly Wine bloke to win on Sunday!)