I’ve never done my family tree – but I’ve got a hunch, I’m part vampire. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t go out biting innocent virgins. (I live in the South Wales valleys – they’re pretty scarce in these parts). But I do have good reason for thinking Dracula was my granddad. First off, I [...]
I have to share this email with you, hot from the JD spambox. My reply is below. Big takeaway from this one. From: *********** | ************ [mailto:*******@**********.co.uk] Sent: Thursday, June 8, 2017 2:01 PM To: James Daniel james@jamesthecopywriter.co.uk Subject: Savings Available until 30 June Dear James, Up until the end of this month we’re offering [...]
Ever done something you’re not proud of? I don’t mean as a yoof. We all pulled girls’ pigtails and mocked the boy with the massive nose, didn’t we? I’m not proud of that stuff, but I was young so I forgive myself. (Plus they both beat the crap out of me, so my conscience is [...]
“No I’m not doing that. Nobody does that.” There it is. The 8 daftest words I’ve ever heard from the mouth of an adult human. How? Well, this was a guy I knew back when I hung out at the local brekkie networks. (Desperate times. The people were nice. But not the kind of contacts you need, [...]
Joy of joys. I’m bouncing with excitement today. Because someone…I think it’s him next door…just walked off with my garden hose! (Okay, I don’t know it’s him, but…well, he looks the sort, doesn’t he?) But anyway – it’s good news. Great news. Because now I can buy that new one I saw on telly last [...]
Want some terrible advice? I mean, gut-wrenching stuff that’ll cost you sales? Okay – go hang out in copy forums. Caveat first: there are some good forums out there. Great ones too, if you know where to look. But most are full of cretins taking advice from semi-cretins…because in the world of the blind, the [...]
If you had to make a serious ton of money this year… (And you had no conscience…) So you’d stoop to literally anything, no matter how depraved… What would you do? Me? I wouldn’t get into drugs or human trafficking. No point. There’s an easier, totally legal way: Become a Tone of Voice Consultant. Kerching! [...]
My filling cracked yesterday. Years of gummy bears took their toll, and I was whisked off to the dentist’s chair – for 40 minutes of nerve-scraping, jaw-thwacking agony that I wouldn’t wish on anyone. Except Michael Gove. And as I sat there, squirming….and thinking “Why bother? I’ll be dead in 50 years anyway”…who should pop [...]
Remember your journey to your desk this morning? Whether you took 3 steps across the landing like me, or spent an hour crawling through traffic…do you recall that vital moment, when you turned into someone else? When you morphed, Kafka-style, into a whole different being? No? Oh. I see. Well, maybe you didn’t change at [...]
I love that headline. And I’ve just sent an email out to my list, using it as a subject. Truth be told, I’ve been wanting to test it for ages. Not because it’s a great story (more on that in a moment). No, I wanted to use it because, I figured my readers would open [...]